Thursday, January 8, 2009

Let Yourself Be In Love!!

A: Mayuu, I wanted to tell you this one very important thing.....
Me: Hey! U sounding so happy! Tell me.....
A: Mayu, I think I love him.
Me: Whom? When did this happen and most importantly, how is it that i don't know about this?
Okay! Let me guess....I think I kinda know about this, don't I?
A: Yess..You are right! I thought about it a lot and I guess I was acting stupid!
Me: Ya! You were just trying to supress your feelings for him and in turn trying to run away from the situation!
A: I totally agree with you mayu....But you know wat? I am feelin so happy to let it out to someone.... feel very contented though I somewhere know what future holds for me......
Me: That's good and i also know that requires lots of understanding and maturity....But there must be atleast something that you must be expecting, right?
A: No! Nothing at all! I want to keep loving him with all those intensly endless doubts.....
Me: And unlike all our other friends, I love you for that decision! Afterall, isn't Love All About Giving And Not Having!
A: Ya! I don't care about the consequences as far as I love him....
Me: And I respect you for that!
A: Thanks!



Initially I was very dubious about posting this conversation that I shared with one of my dearest friends...
Not only because it was very personal but also because I wanted an independent existence of the thoughts that I wanted to put forward. I had been thinking about this for quite some time and I wanted to come to some appropriate conclusion...I was just on the verge of forming some conclusions with very less apposite facts when consequently I had the opportunity to share this very beautiful conversation with my friend.
Beautiful not only because she was sharing one of the most important decisions of her life but Beautiful also because it helped me form some conclusions for myself.....And I can very conveniently say that my post would be incomplete without this conversation.



I often wonder about this, I mean so many people might be supressing their feelings towards the person they love the most in their lives; with ofcourse reasons multiple and diverse. But the most common of all resons being- "Absence of mutual giving and receiving of love". Very comfortably you convince your soul to move on though your soul remains equally unconvinced...Its not that you live unhappily the rest of your lives if you practice that suppression of love though anomalistically your heart does feel the disparity.
No matter what, you cannot forget somethings in life. The harder you try equally failed your efforts go..Your soul is lost in debility allowing your distant past to make connection with your present and letting the silence erase the intervening years.

You keep convincing yourself that if not you then the person you love the most in your live is the Sun in somebody else's Sky. But at the same time you cannot stop yourself from questioning the absence of the Sun in your Sky or the presence of darkness in your sky.....


But nature balances and also teaches you to!
With those lessons learnt and trying to practise to balance, you let yourself fall in love again. The fact might still remains, that in maximum cases you don't fall in love again.....This time, its more like an Illusion of Love!

"First time what happens is Love, all the other times its Life"
-This holds so Goddamn true every time!

So, this time what has happened with you is Life and not Love.....But again You have a great Acceptance-Level towards everything- Love and Life. And therefore you accept the Love that Life offers you and vice versa". And then you move on though with frequent thoughts and memories whether sad or happy from your past love..
Now, you supposedly start enjoying your life with the person whom you try hard to convince yourself to be with...Very comfortably you give and accept love to this new person disregarding the pain you feel within by suppressing your feelings towards the person you still love the most in your life.....The very same person you loved, you love and will keep Loving.....

You cannot spend the rest of your lives with the person you don't love and keep him/her under an illusion and consequently you cannot spend he rest of your lives with the person you love because of reasons multiple and diverse.....

Your tormented heart now needs answers.....
Well, may be the least that is expected from you is accept what you truly love and live life. That does somewhere leave a scope to think to ourselves that it might just mean living alone or single! But the facts in my post are silent about what that would mean and hence I would want to leave it up to people to decide indiviually what that line means..It sounds very dificult and becomes one of the most difficult truths of your life. It is the one of the most difficult compromise to fulfill.. But it will certainly soothe if not assuage your pain.

It is highly important to be in love. So for its significance and for reasons infinite, just Let Yourself Be In Love!
You cannot disregard the importance of "moving on". But that also depends upon what is the essence of "Moving on".
"Moving on" for you might mean letting yourself fall in love all over again. "Moving on" for me might mean falling in love with my my family, my friends, my work,my passions, et al though very much in continuity with my existing feelings for my love and with a comfortable realisation of the consequences. And "Moving on" for a third person might mean something else.
Its subjective with an exception of non-suppression! Just exonerate yourself from the feeling of suppression because suppressing your feelings is not the only way out. Infact it worsens the situation..It will amount to running away from your very self and from your very life.....

Love yourself and keep loving what you loved, What you love and What you will be loving.......
With this very soon you will see yourself creating beauty from the depths of your wounded soul!

9 comments:

wishful thinking said...

i like the title very much.... nice one mayu...
i feel love surpasses everything..past,present n future...

Unknown said...

"Love yourself"

- ..best!

Mayu said...

@Rashmi-
Thanks! N Yes! Love so surpasses everything....Even One's Soul..!!

Mayu said...

@Arnie-
Thanks!

Geeta said...

i find evry word of this sooo true....
love u mayu......

Geeta said...

love is pure...if u r wid a true heart and soul in love wid sumone...its the best feelin ever...but....
like any seed sown in the earth....love thrives only if it recieves some warmth...or else it just vanishes away after several painful blows it gets in return...

i know love is all giving and not recieving but stil...love exists in a heart...and wen it cums to human hearts expectin at least a li'll love bak is a tendency....

jus my opinion...wel and...experience......
it hurts to keep lovin so u hav to stop if u wanna be happy...

Mayu said...

@ Geeta-

Love also grows in stages..whether reciprocated or not..
Yes..! initially one does expect da opposite person 2 reciprocate that love but gradually you will reach a stage where your love has passed beyond reciprocation..n this also is in a tendency of a human being.....though in this respect we would be talking about "Super-Humans"..(super human in their qualities and feelings towards others)......And well, I wudn say this is my personal experience but i have ppl around me who have had such experiences..!! :):)

Arshat Chaudhary said...

Profound! good post.. :)

Mayu said...

@Arshat-
hey dats coming from a guy who's jst won an award in the blog sphere..:)Thanks arshat.!